Friday, July 17, 2009

Morning's Not For Me

I wake up like a person who needs to know how to do everything again for the first time. Like walk. I stagger and weave in the morning as I make my way to the crapper. My brain doesn't work and usually actually hurts. My eyes won't focus. I've tried to write a brief answer to a comment on the blog before I've been up at least an hour and my fingers just do not work. Like little clubs with no memory of the keyboard. I hate mornings. I always have.

My mother claimed I was born a night person. She was always a morning person, so this was just one more way in which I was defective. But her assertion that fresh out of the womb I wanted to sleep in and stay up all night rings very true. I've had jobs that required 5 AM call times. The best thing for me to do was sleep most of the prior day, then just wake up in the late evening and then my call time would be at a reasonable hour, still part of the night.

I was an assistant to the fashion coordinator at Nordstrom in Salt Lake and Nordstrom likes to have very early morning meetings for management. I can remember driving down Emigration canyon road at 6 AM and not gaining consciousness until pulling into the parking garage. I call this sleep driving. I was completely on autopilot during all those early morning drives down that narrow, steep, winding canyon road. I know I drove the road asleep and speeding.

Now some jackass is calling me every morning at 8:01. This would be great if I really needed a wake-up call, but it's torture since I stayed up till 3 Am the night before. That is my normal bedtime. I know it's wrong to the rest of you that I have the luxury of living my life according to my own biorhythms, but that's the only good thing about being disabled--that and Medicare coverage.

So today I plan to make some phone calls. I will reregister with the Do Not Call Registry. That won't stop this asshole, but it's a start. I'm getting too many solicitations everyday and it isn't all that much fun fucking with the poor schmucks who need that work. The Diabetes Association has stopped calling me, but the person who is calling me is, I'm pretty sure the person who first called me for the Diabetes Association and got the angry bear that is me in the morning and decided it was fun to wake me up. Now I'll start disconnecting my phone at night.

8 comments:

Cat said...

Oooh a phone call when I am sleeping is one sure way to get my ire up!

Utah Savage said...

It is a nasty way to wake up.

Gail said...

Hi Utah-

our phone has a "do not disturb" feature so if anyone calls it does not ring and whomever can leave a message unbeknown to us. nice huh?

Love you
Gail
peace......

Utah Savage said...

Gail, lucky you. My phone is a cheap piece of crap that doesn't have a turn off button. I can disconnect the phone part while leaving the charger plugged in. So, just so I remember...

themom said...

That would irk the hell out of me. I'm so not a phone person anyway. I have registered and re-registered with that Do Not Call registry - what a joke. Rots of Ruck dear.

Beach Bum said...

Mornings suck now though I use to love them. Especially since my daughter gets up at 5:30am no matter what.

Fran said...

Turning the phone off is one solution, because you need your sleep. But then there is the Z situation.


I have tried this tactic with good success....
when the prank caller calls- Say Yes Operator, trace this call.

Hopefully the schmuck will run scared & never call again.

Thorne said...

Oh Peggy... you just perfectly described me in the morning. I've always said that sunrise is only beautiful if I've been up all nite for it.