Sunday, September 27, 2009

I'm Not Feeling Well

It's funny that I was feeling well until I saw the oncology hematologist Friday. I thought it was only a one time thing that my platelet count was low. But it's been the last two tests (6 months apart) that showed a low platelet count. Now that I know it's been going on for awhile, I'm starting to worry a little. After my exam yesterday and talking to my new doctor, it looks like it might be more serious than I thought. How powerful is the mind that once I realizes it might be a more serious problem I start to feel ill. They took more blood to do other tests, more specific tests. It's now a waiting game to know whether it's bad or really bad.

Tomorrow at the crack of dawn I have to haul my ass out of bed to go get an ultra-sound of my liver and spleen. I have to do this fasting. This is tantamount to torture for me. No coffee with loads of milk and a bit of sugar? No dallying with the dogs? Out to pee and then breakfast for them and then I'm gone for most of the day. I have to drop my car off in the AM for safety inspection and to have it winterized. Then a friend is giving me a ride to the ophthalmologists for the appointment I should have made two years ago.

Again, I apologize for not visiting you at your blog to read and comment. I'm still rewriting the novel and tweeting. I've found that twitter is a powerful tool for lobbying politicians for healthcare reform. Now that I'm old and less inclined to do the boots on the ground work of real protesting, along comes twitter to make it possible to demonstrate online. It's a powerful tool. Not a social networking tool, but a power to the people network for societal change. I resist the "friending" thing. If I talk to you on twitter, your part of my network. You're all special to me, so "friending" seems silly to me. It is the friending aspect of FaceBook that turns me off, like high school cliques. Twitter is not like that. And I love the challenge of saying something meaningful in short bursts. I think in many ways this can only help with writing in general.

For the few of you who do still stop by, I thank you from the bottom of my shriveled little heart.

15 comments:

Fran said...

Awwwww Utah~ I hope the tests come back with better news. I hate waiting for test results, because my mind tends to run off with worst case scenarios. Actual results usually come in better than what I imagine.
Hang in there. Bottom line is you will do whatever is needed to be done to make the best decision for you.
One day at a time, Amiga.

P.S. I know your hands are full & you have less time to visit blogs. Luv ya anyway!

Jack Jodell said...

Hey, Utah, we all DEFINITELY hope your tests come back with good results! DO keep us posted, as you know we all care!

femail doc said...

It could be one of the drugs you're taking that is making your platelet count low. If you want to send a list to me at femailhealthnews@aol.com, I can give you a notion whether any of them are culprits. Also much as I love twitter, if you've the time or inclination to carry on slightly longer conversations by e-mail, I'd prefer that.

Utah Savage said...

Dear Doc, that was the first thing they tested for. My internist sent a very detailed and precise list of the drugs I take regularly, time of day, dosage etc, and the drugs I only take as needed and refill dates so that they got an accurate view of any possible drug cause. No dice.

Utah Savage said...

Dear Doc, I'd love to carry on an email conversation with you. You've been so helpful to me. I only hope I have something entertaining enough to compensate you for the trouble. Oddly, since you read much of the book, such as it was this time last year, you know more about me than me real docs. You know much more about me than even my shrink.

Gail said...

HI UTAH-

I have recently had that same ultrasound, actually it was even more of my insides - what they referred to as a "full abdomen and kidneys". I know it i so unsettling and for me the anticipation was way worse that the test itself. I will be praying for you in the morning - and for all good outcomes.

And I am no doctor but blood work is so varied in it's results as it is influenced by so many factors. I am sure your doctor is ruling out or in all your medications and so forth as factors in your numbers.

You are top on my list for prayers and sending good energy.

Love to you\
Gail
peace.....

themom said...

Utah, I hate to hear all this. I'm sorry you aren't feeling well also. I will have you in my thoughts, and please...please keep us up to date on these results. We worry - you know!! <3 !

thelass said...

Hoping for a good outcome on those tests. Ugh.

Sherry said...

i'm sending you happy healing vibes!

Madam Z said...

Hey Utah, I'm sorry to hear of your travails. I sure hope the tests show nothing serious and that you can now go back to eating and drinking your "coffee with loads of milk and a bit of sugar" and "dallying with the dogs."

We have something in common besides the Utah connection. I would have reacted just as you did to the hematologist's comments. From feeling well to feeling ill in the twinkling of an eye!

I hope it helps you to know that your blog buddies are all pulling for you.

sunshine said...

Sorry to hear that you are not well right now. I hope that all those tests come back alright.
Thinking of you... ((BigHugs))
Laura

Randal Graves said...

May you get an A+ on all of your tests. Maybe even a gold star.

La Belette Rouge said...

Oh, dear you, please post and/or Tweet when you know more. I am thinking of you and am abstaining form coffee with cream and sugar until I hear your good news that all is well.xoxo

Utah Savage said...

Thank you all. LBR, don't hurt yourself on my account. If I abstained from coffee with milk and sugar, I'll kill someone. I'll know nothing before the 9th. So carry on. And Randal, if anyone could get an A on all her tests it's me.

Freida Bee, MD said...

Utah- I sure do hope you have the same thing my grandmother had, which was never diagnosed. She just found herself to be a couple pints low on blood. She used to say she was leaking. That was 10 years ago. They topped her off, and she's doing great, seeing a dentist, as she calls it, and saying, "What?" constantly as she can hardly hear, just reading and reading like a sponge. (I'm on my way, as apparently I do not hear as well as others, because I have to ask people to repeat things all the time and sometimes they even seem annoyed. And, lots of loud noise is very agitating to me. I quit coffee recently, perhaps, moronically.

Love and Hug.