Thursday, January 19, 2012

Why Mormons Love Multi-Level Marketing: The Celestial Kingdom

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/eb/The_Plan_of_Salvation.jpg
It's a complicated place, this Mormon version of heaven, but what most non-Mormon's don't know about it is that men get to have more than one wife in the Celestial Kingdom. This is a pretty good deal for men who were cheated out of plural marriages by the pesky laws of the US Government not all that long ago.

Mitts Grandfather took the family to Mexico to escape those laws which is why you'll never hear Mitt tell heartwarming stories about his grandfather. It's as if Mitt has no ancestors at all. But he has his money to keep him warm (at least his money that isn't staying warm in the Cayman Islands where it's sheltered from taxes. as if taxes were much of a problem for Mitt, at 15% or less).  But he can still look forward to that big polygamous family in the sky, once he dies.

One of the strange things about that Multi-Level Celestial Kingdom Mormons believe in is it seems to breed a fondness for all kinds of multi-level marketing schemes. Some of them turn out to be semi-legit and some of them turn out to be as bogus as chain letters, but if you're a Mormon and a fellow Mormon is selling you some load of crap, you're likely to buy. Why? Because he has a Temple recommend, that's why.

4 comments:

Jang chub Ozer said...

I thought that read "Mormons are marketing multi level love" but I have been drinkin a lot lately.

Mauigirl said...

There are certainly a lot of weird beliefs in the Mormon religion that I didn't know about! Thanks for the info!

1138 said...

They do a darned good job of selling ancestry.com

D.K. Raed said...

like me, you've probably noticed what a hard time mitt has when GOP debate topics enter the realm of the afterlife. couple night ago re: Fidel Castro's death, mitt said "when he meets his maker" ... to which newt snarked that Castro won't meet his maker, he'll be in another place. poor mitt, can't say outloud his religion doesn't allow for hell.

then tonight, mitt said something about when Castro (again with Castro, why the fixation on Castro, oh right, they are in Florida) leaves this planet. I was surprised newt didn't jump in again ... maybe even the self-proclaimed bignewtbrain is unaware of the LDS belief that the dead will actually live on other planets?